Have a Friendship That Needs Mending?

After being over-served the hard stuff during an evening of debauchery, my coworkers, Donnie and Austin, got into a little tiff. They both said some things they can't take back. Sent some texts they can't un-send. We're talking derogatory remarks about people's grandmas here. It got U-G-L-Y. Donnie has been apologizing profusely all week long, while Austin has been moping around like somebody kicked his puppy. Because these guys are both dear to me, I decided Donnie needed some assistance in the making-up department from yours truly. I explained to Donnie that during times like these, one must launch a more aggressive apology initiative. There must be a grand gesture.

We made a card for Austin. This is what it included:

I So Sorry, Boo...

What I got to do to make you love me?

What I got to do to make you care?

What do I do when lightning strikes me?

And I wake to find that you're not there?

It's sad, so sad

It's a sad, sad situation.

And it's getting more and more absurd.

It's sad, so sad

Why can't we talk it over?

Oh it seems to me

That sorry seems to be the hardest word.

"This is just a cookie bouquet away from being an adequate apology. It's the sorority way," I said. "Really?" Donnie asked. Yeah, it's true. I mean, we would have probably quoted Dave Matthews, but Elton John was more fitting for the circumstances. Sometimes "I'm sorry" by itself doesn't cut it. You gotta apologize with flair. Also, we posted it on Austin's Facebook wall. So now all of Donnie and Austin's friends know how sorry Donnie is.

I instructed Donnie to present this card very contritely with a cupcake or other baked good. The result? It was a winning move! Well, I mean Donnie's still in the doghouse, but the ice is beginning to thaw. One heartfelt card and a brownie did more to mend their friendship in five minutes than five days of apologizing. High five for me!