Rob is One.

Robinson's birthday party was a big success! I was very touched by the excellent turnout...

"Uncle" Bean: [scanning the room filled with wall-to-wall people] This is a lot [of people]. I was not expecting this.

Me: I know! I can't believe so many people came out today!

Uncle Bean: How many people did you invite?

Me: Uhh...50?

Bean: Why did you do that?

Me: [quietly] I don't know. I didn't think anybody would come.

I don't know why I have this anxiety that nobody is ever coming to my parties. We are very fortunate to have lots of people who love us, and they all fought the oppressive heat to travel to our little corner of Texas to celebrate our baby boy's first birthday.

This was obviously my first time planning a child's birthday party, and let me just say that even the simple cake and punch home parties today are vastly more elaborate than when I was growing up. I began brainstorming and planning Rob's party way back in January, and it's a good thing I did, because it took a long time to make all this stuff and to get an education in Children's Party Planning in the Year 2011. I have to credit sites like Catch My Party and numerous blogs and sites where I researched and found inspiration in planning Rob's shindig. I feel like I ought to share some of what I learned here on my blog since I learned so much from the dozens of blogs I read. Pay it forward, right? 

The party had a vintage toy theme and a red and aqua color scheme. My inspiration? The invitations:

I found them on Etsy!

I turned the entry table into a display for vintage and retro toys and books. I "shopped my house", though I did have lofty ideas about a Classic Sock Monkey, jacks, marbles, yo-yo's, jump ropes and a Slinky. Ultimately, I chose to concentrate my party budget on the food instead of buying toys. And check out the photo collage that's hanging in the spot usually reserved for my bridal portrait. Do those pics look familiar? They are the monthly "Rob and Laney" photos arranged chronologically in a Shutterfly collage poster.  I also replaced other wall decor throughout the house with framed portraits of Rob. You know, so everyone knows that it's all about Robinson. 

Ever since I saw "sweets stylist" Amy Atlas on the Today show talking about creating dessert tables for holiday parties last year, I have been itching to create a dessert table. I had never heard of them before, but I suddenly felt that they were absolutely crucial to the success of a party.

I scoured the internet for blogs and photos to teach myself how to create a dessert table. Perhaps I could save people some of that work and share what I learned are the key elements to creating a dessert table:

1. Identify a color palette to use throughout the table
2. Create a backdrop. Mine is foam board covered in gift wrap, but there are loads of other clever and creative ideas. A Google Image search is a great place to start looking.
3. Use a tablecloth. Aesthetically, the tablecloth was more important than I originally thought. 
4. Use risers to create a height variation. Dessert tables where all items are placed flat on the table look a little "off". This riser was created using a giftwrapped box, but I've seen professional tables that use polystyrene blocks, acrylic blocks or risers...you're really limited only by your imagination and your financial resources. Mostly your financial resources.
5. Create a symmetrical presentation. I've seen tables with a more varied presentation, with varieties of candies and sweets on pedestal stands and in jars, and it looks terrific. If you're a dessert table novice like me, and don't already have all the serving platters and pieces, it can get expensive in a hurry if you're trying to duplicate an elaborate display seen on designer blogs and in magazines. I had all sorts of cute ideas, mostly involving red rope licorice, blue sour straws, custom M&Ms, and apothecary jars. But guess how expensive it is to collect a half-dozen large apothecary jars and 20 pounds of candy to fill them? Very. Think in the hundreds of dollars, and you better be careful you don't buy old, gnarly candy from some wholesale candy warehouse unloading old product. Guess who can't eat candy? The birthday boy and most of his friends. Guess who won't eat candy? The health conscious adults who composed the majority of my guests. I loved the idea, but ultimately decided to pass on candy this year.

After a few practice runs, I baked this cake from scratch, y'all. My baking adventure deserves it's own post, so stay tuned for that. The bottom tier of this cake is 7-Up pound cake with lemon buttercream filling. My great grandmother used to make 7-Up cake for me when I was little, so it's a sentimental favorite. Added bonus: its density makes it ideal for stacking tiers of cake. The top tier is red velvet cake with cream cheese frosting filling. I covered the cake in marshmallow fondant. I won't lie, it's kind of a big undertaking, but I wanted a big cake, and I knew that a professional cake this size covered in fondant would have likely cost over $100. How much do I estimate I spent in supplies and ingredients to create this cake, plus the previous cakes I made as my "trial runs"? Let's not talk about that. I think by his third or fourth birthday this little investment will have paid for itself. Plus, I had fun. It was a great creative outlet for me. I wish I had cakes to bake for him all the time!

My kid likes banana pudding, and Paula Deen's "Not Yo Mama's Banana Pudding" is the tastiest recipe I've tried. So that's the story behind that. Not everybody at the party tried the pudding, but everybody who did try the pudding went back for seconds and requested the recipe.

It was important that I made treats for the party that my son and his buddies could eat, but that the adults would also want to eat. Hopefully I struck that balance with the blondies, brownies, and chocolate chip cookie bars that rounded out my dessert table. If I had a little more time, and table space, I think I would have included something like sliced strawberries. I offered no fruit at this party, and I think this group would have enjoyed something like that. I think next year I will omit one of the baked goods in favor of some fruit and a cream cheese dip.

Everything at this party was available in miniature. Miniature brownies, miniature burgers, and a miniature Radio Flyer as a cake topper! Apparently Radio Flyer made these a few years ago, but no more! I scored this bad boy on eBay.

I was convinced this party required a "birthday banner" and I enjoyed making this for Rob.

Sliders and mini hot dogs (or hot dogs that we cut in half, if you want to get technical). I called them "baby burgers" and "hot pups". You know, because it's a party for a baby. It seemed fitting.

 I may have gone a little nuts making tent cards to identify everything.

I made a huge batch of homemade mac n cheese, but even if nobody but Robinson ate it, the effort was well worth it! He had THREE bowls!

For all my planning, I wasn't quite sure what to do besides make sure everybody had a beverage and that all children who locked themselves in the bathroom were rescued. About an hour into the party, I asked one of the guests, a father of three, "What do I do? Cake, then presents?" Turns out you do presents. Then cake. This is what Robinson wanted to do while we were opening presents:

He's fascinated. Lucky for me, who felt a little silly and self conscious about opening a dozen or so presents intended for a one year old boy by myself, while my child sat absentmindedly nearby, there were a couple of sweet little girls who were super stoked about opening Rob's presents for him. Blogger's Note: Rubik's Cube was decoration from entryway, not a new gift.

"This present is from me. Well, actually, my dad bought it. But it's from me."

 Could these sweet girls be any more excited to open these gifts?

"Look, Robinson!"

This party hat was made on impulse earlier in the week. I didn't even expect him to wear it, but "Uncle Scotty" was quick thinking and balanced the hat on his head in the middle of singing "Happy Birthday" so that Angie could snap a quick photo. He looks contemplative, yes? He was actually really happy to have all of us singing to him and cheering for him. I knew that could be a little overwhelming for a tot, so I practiced with him in the week or two before the party. Every time he sat down for a meal I would sing "Happy Birthday" and cheer enthusiastically. By the time of the party he was accustomed to this and smiled big.

A birthday bib might have been a good idea. I actually didn't plan a bib at all, and if he got dirty that was fine with me. It really made no difference. He played with the frosting a little, and ate a couple bites after some coaxing from me. By the time he blew out his candle, he had eaten the three bowls of mac n cheese and two cups of chocolate milk. He was STUFFED.

This was a favorite moment: Scotty took Rob's hands and plopped them splat against either side of the cake, and Rob just kept them there. I'm not kidding, he didn't move his hands for a full minute or two.

All the beautiful photos in this post were taken by Angie. Thanks, girl! It was great to be able to enjoy the party, mingle with guests and be "in the moment" without having to sacrifice having photos. Plus your camera is bad-ass, and you're highly skilled and loaded with talent.

We had a wonderful day. Thanks to everyone who helped make Robinson's day extra special, and for being so wonderful throughout the year! We love y'all! Already thinking about next year...

Wonder Woman Super Mom Party Planner

I've been preparing for Robinson's first birthday party for months, and it's been a labor of love! I've been so inspired by other people's party blogs and sites like Catch My Party and Etsy. I started with an invitation, which guided my choices in theme and color scheme. From there I tried to thoughtfully plan a menu that adults would enjoy but that Robinson and his baby-friends can also eat.

I love to throw parties, but I rarely have the opportunity, so I jumped into planning Rob's birthday party with both feet. Somewhere between constructing a handmade "Happy Birthday Robinson" 10-foot pennant banner and testing made-from-scratch red velvet cake, I realized something. These Wonder Woman Super Moms who plan these elaborate, extravagant, inspiring Super-Sweet-Birthday-Parties typically order their refreshments from a bakery, and/or purchase printable or pre-made party decorations. Never on any of these blogs did I find a party where the mother single-handedly made all the food from scratch and designed and constructed all the decorations from nothing more than cardstock, glue stick and an x-acto knife. It's a minor observation I didn't notice until I was knee-deep in confectioners sugar, with food coloring stains from my fingernails up to my elbow.

What does Wonder Woman Super Mom know that I don't? That there is no glory in making everything from scratch, it's all about the finished product? That doing everything yourself is for suckers? That I just bought a one-way ticket to Crazytown by taking on more than I can handle? What have I gotten myself into? Martha Stewart I am not. I'm no Superman. I meant well--I was just a proud mama approaching this with a can-do attitude, wanting to make every element of Robinson's party with love. Plus, it seemed like fun. And it seemed more economical to do it myself. So far everything is going just fine and I've really enjoyed the challenge. But everything up until now has been planning and staging. As the party looms closer, I've reached the place where the rubber meets the road. I've tested all my recipes over a period of months, but now I have to make them all within 48 hours. And it needs to be delicious. Right now I'm in the middle of crumb coating the birthday cake so I can cover it in fondant and decorate it tomorrow. I tell you all this so that if I collapse in a heap in the middle of my floor, covered in confectioners sugar and red food coloring, everyone will know what happened to me.

I will post party pictures and details when everything comes together! Yeah, I think I've lost my mind, but there's no turning back now! Wish me luck!

Rob's Ready for the Pub "Crawl" | St. Patrick's Day 2011

"They're always after me lucky charms!"

Yes, it's true! My redheaded Irish baby is crawling just in time for St. Patrick's Day! That's my boy!

For a little festive entertainment, see last year's St. Patrick's Day post. Have a great day! Maybe if I'm still in a celebratory mood this evening I'll put a little green food coloring in my Miller Lite? It'll probably just make the beer taste funny and turn my teeth green...worth it!

An Un-Valentine's Day Post

I was watching the movie Valentine's Day last weekend, which left me with more questions than answers:

1. Why do people keep hiring Ashton Kutcher to make movies?
2. Natalie Portman co-stars in Ashton Kutcher's latest film. What? Why? Are we sure she went to Harvard? I went to a state school and am not an actress, but if somebody offered me a role alongside Ashton Kutcher, I'd say "No thanks."
3. Jessica Biel and Jessica Alba in the same movie?! Was Jessica Simpson not available? I'm saying they're all terrible.

Anyway, if you haven't seen Valentine's Day--don't. Also, if you haven't seen Valentine's Day, you don't know that Ashton Kutcher plays a florist (I know, I know). It reminded me of a time that I worked in a flower shop and helped a clumsy man's attempt at romance. I don't want to spoil the ending, but it was a big, fat FAIL.

So, a jittery, nervous, dazed man wanders into the flower shop as if he's accidentally stumbled into Narnia. He wants flowers delivered to his wife at work as soon as possible, and chooses an arrangement from the cooler.

As I'm collecting delivery information and ask what he wants the card to say, he asks if he can handwrite the message. I offer him a blank card, and after several minutes of serious deliberation, he scrawls a message onto the card, folds it so the message is facing out, and hands it to me. It reads:

I can't believe you when you say you don't love me anymore.

Before you file for divorce, can we see a therapist

and try to work through our problems?

I flinched, and my eye twitched, the way it does when information is thrust upon me that is absolutely none of my business. I feel really uncomfortable. I look up, and locking eyes with the fidgety man, I ask, "Would you like to seal this in an envelope?"

"No," he says with a sudden surge of certainty and assertiveness. "I want her to see the message immediately."

"Oh, hell," I think to myself. No good can come from this. It's a good thing he has me. "Oh," I say, trying to carefully choose my words. "Don't you think she would prefer such a private message be...less visible to others?"  Hint, hint jackass! 

"No, no," he replies, becoming slightly squirmy. "It's important that she see this right away."

"I see. Umm, isn't this being delivered to a place of business?"

"Yes."

"And are there other people at this place of business, or is she the only person there?"

"No, it's a big office."

"Ok, so these flowers are going to be intercepted by a receptionist or a secretary, right?"

"Uh, yeah, probably."

"Alright, well here's what's going to happen. When flowers are delivered to an office, the women converge on the flowers like ants at a picnic. They love it. And in doing so, they're all going to read your deeply personal message to your wife. Then all the ladies in the office are going to know your wife's personal business. She's going to be mortified, and your grand gesture is going to backfire in a big way. I need you to trust me on this." Also, I think you need bigger flowers. I keep that thought to myself.

I slide an envelope across the table. He still refuses to sign it. Now I want to divorce him, too.

As soon as he leaves, I write his wife's name on the front of an envelope, and seal the card inside. He may be a complete moron whose marriage is about to implode, but I'm not going to help him embarrass his wife at work.

Us bitches gotta stick together.

No Child of Mine Will Get Away With This

Amy Robach, Today Show host for this Christmas Eve, brought a young YouTube sensation to my attention, and I wish she hadn't. It really started my Christmas Eve all kinds of wrong. This must be how Lewis Black feels all the time.

Here's the scene: Christmas morning 2009. A three-year-old boy, after opening many presents (including a Wii) opens yet another: children's books. Cue the screaming violins from Psycho. Little Angel in monster footie pajamas (how appropriate) begins shouting at his parents about how books are not toys and you don't give books for Christmas. He actually said "What the heck is that?!" "No, I hate it!" "Yeah, poo! I said poo!" Little Angel quickly changes gears and begins sizing up his next wrapped gift, indicating that it better not be books.

I'm not amused. I'm horrified. Maybe books are a little unexpected at Christmas. Hell, I know that. I've unwrapped quite a few books and encyclopedias on Christmas morning, in addition to other non-toy gift items such as socks and pajamas...do you think a four year old is as excited to receive a pair of socks as she is to receive She-Ra's Crystal Castle?

Would you rather...

No, she isn't, but she smiles and says "thank you" with enthusiasm, because her parents raised her to be appreciative and express gratitude for the gifts she is given, and shes doesn't expect each gift to be as magnificent as She-Ra's Crystal Castle. I think if you're old enough to develop an expectation that you are entitled to a mountain of toys, then you are old enough to understand the importance of the phrase "thank you". But I digress.

I asked Steve if he thought that was acceptable behavior. He said, "I would have been disappointed about getting books when I was three...then again, when I was a kid, I used to roll a bunch of socks together, call it a "ball" and play catch with myself in the yard. I was poor, remember?"

Mommy Dearest, who instead of seeing her child's Christmas tantrum as a sign of the apocalypse, or feeling ashamed that she forgot to teach manners to her son, just laughed and laughed...then posted the video on YouTube to share with friends and family...because when your child acts like a spoiled, ungrateful brat, well, that's a special moment you want to share.

The video went viral, reaching a million hits since Christmas Day last year. To date, this video has 1,945 "likes" and 836 "dislikes" wait, make that 837, and apparently the comments became so harsh and critical that Mommy Dearest disabled commenting on the video and posted this in defense of her spoiled, ungrateful child:

"After opening a whole bunch of toys, my son 3 year old came across a present with books....keep in mind that this was kinda like his first "real" Christmas....and again he's was only three years old!....let me repeat. ONLY THREE YEARS OLD... And that he could just about understand and get the concept of the whole gift getting thing. I guess much to the blame of me, the media, and every commercial out there on TV he was more under the perception that you only get "toys" for christmas. To him Books are the fun time we spend reading (no less than three) every night before he goes to bed. Let me make something clear again. HE REALLY DOES LOVE BOOKS! But I'm guessing he was "overwhelmed" after opening way too many gifts (my fault I went overboard that year) and I think he felt "tricked upon" when he opened the books.....plus the fact that we were laughing at his reaction kinda egged him on to say the Poo statement..... He really is one of the sweetest kids I know and to see this reaction (if you know him yourself) IS cute."

She goes on to assure us that she has taught him better since then. Taught him what? That Christmas is in fact not all about presents, but about the birth of Jesus? That it's more important to give than to receive? That we must remember those who are less fortunate than we are? That when given a gift, the only acceptable response is a smile and a "thank you"? No, you silly poo face! She taught him that at Christmas, in addition to lots and lots of toys, you also receive other non-toy items as gifts! That's the lesson Mommy Dearest taught Little Angel! Hey, Mommy Dearest: don't feel like it's your responsibility to teach your child about manners, gratitude, or selflessness. They'll teach it to him in public school!

Fast forward one year later. Mommy Dearest and Little Angel are on the Today Show, where Little Angel's behavior is nothing short of obnoxious. After listening to Mommy Dearest (whose fabulous parenting skills won her a trip to New York to the Today Show) bitch about how others don't find Little Angel delightful, and she doesn't understand, and he really does love books! We have a moment of truth: Amy Robach presents Little Angel with a present. Spoiler: It isn't books. Little Angel unwraps what looks to be Woody from Toy Story. Little Angel's reaction: "Oh, I already have this". Ahh, yes, Mommy Dearest, you've done a glorious job. Your work is done. After some prompting, he eventually said "Thank you". Jeez, what do you expect? I mean, he already has it!



Oh, and just to reiterate: Mommy Dearest wants you to know that he really does love books! Because, ya know, that's the only thing wrong with this video.

Our First Family Christmas Card

I am very pleased with how our very first Christmas card turned out. Does it conjur up images of angels and  innocence and hope and wonder? Yeah, that's totally what I was going for [shaking head "no"] At one point during the shoot I sprawled out in the floor in sheer exhaustion and a little exasperation. My face hurt from playing cheerleader to coax a smile from Robinson. "Where's my happy boy? THERE'S my happy boy!" Honestly, I was just patient and snapping away and Robinson eventually gave me this shot. Not too shabby for a novice amateur photographer with a cell phone camera, eh? Thanks again to Shutterfly for such speedy delivery of our beautiful cards!

Fortunately (thanks to my Dad) I won't be taking next year's Christmas card picture with a cell phone camera because I am the proud owner of a new digital camera! I'll review it and post some pictures in a future post...after I learn how to properly use the camera's features!

My Christmas Playlist

Ok, so I told you my world is like a Christmas village, filled with holiday cheer. Pre-Robinson Samantha would make a list of the worst Christmas songs, but since I'm all joyful and whatnot, I'm making a list of my favorite Christmas songs. Sorry to disappoint.

Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree, Brenda Lee

This is a quintessential holiday tune. Can you imagine the "party" scene in Home Alone with a different song?

Jingle Bell Rock, Bobby Helms

I love the Hall and Oates version almost as much. They definitely make a great video, but I love this song because it's just so happy.

Baby it's Cold Outside, Dean Martin

This song is a classic, but in the wrong hands it can play as really campy (I'm looking at you, Jessica Simpson). Dean just makes it cool. He also sings "Silver Bells" better than just about anybody out there.

The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late), The Chipmunks

Steve doesn't care for this one, but I'm a fan because it brings out the kid in all of us.

All I Want for Christmas is You, Mariah Carey

Most of the Christmas songs we all know and love have been around for generations, so it's no small feat for an artist to break through and bring us a Christmas anthem the way Mariah did in 1994. I dare you to listen to this song without smiling. It's even better watching her perform it now. She's all pregnant and happy!

White Christmas, Bing Crosby

Favorite version of my favorite Christmas song, from my favorite Christmas movie!

Have a Holly Jolly Christmas, Burl Ives

Here's a beloved Christmas crooner. Wasn't he the voice in Christmas claymation classics Frosty the Snowman and Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer? Love.

O Little Town of Bethlehem, Jewel

Jewel is truly one of a kind. This is an absolutely gorgeous version of one of my favorite religious Christmas songs. The entire album is fantastic. Also worth a listen: "O Holy Night" and "Ave Maria".

Christmas at Ground Zero, Weird Al Yankovic

This one's for Jarred. We loved when Vh1 aired this video at Christmas time (we loved when Vh1 aired Christmas videos period. Hell, I'd settle for any videos at this point. Except for that Kesha girl.) It's from the early 90's and is a delightful little diddy about celebrating Christmas during nuclear war. The video features old footage from Cold War propaganda films and the song includes lyrics like "I'll duck and cover with my yuletide lover underneath the mistletoe". My brother and I were sick, twisted little kids I guess.
Please Come Home for Christmas, Aaron Neville

Have you experienced the velvet embrace of Aaron Neville's voice? This is like the Christmas song version of a Nora Ephron romantic comedy.
[sidenote: I do a delightful Aaron Neville impression. It sounds sorta like Aaron Neville impersonating Cher impersonating Aaron Neville.]

Auld Lang Syne, Susan Boyle 

Here's another holiday classic that people love to eff up. It's hard to find a truly beautiful version, but Susan's angelic voice is perfect for this song

I'm Bursting With Holiday Cheer

I've always loved Christmas, but the past few years, between unhappiness with my job and the fact that Steve and I work in the retail/service industry (which can truly take the joy out of the season), I haven't really enjoyed the holidays. I've been the surly broad at the Christmas party sipping cider in the corner with my equally unfestive friends and going on about how we are so glad this year is almost over. Not this year. Blame it on motherhood. This year it's like my heart grew three sizes. Just like my ass. Hey-oh! At my house it's Christmas, Christmas, Christmas!

I've been compulsively downloading Christmas music and importing Christmas CDs into iTunes and creating Christmas Playlists for my iPod. I've been listening to Christmas music exclusively for two weeks.

I took Robinson to Target. On the weekend. For fun. This is the moment where you ask me if I'm feeling alright and you touch my forehead to check for fever. At Target, I spent an hour picking out Christmas music, Christmas candles, and Christmas movies. I just couldn't decorate the tree while watching Celebrity Rehab. I had to buy Mickey's Christmas Carol, White Christmas and Love Actually. I also decided that this is the year I become the kind of woman who has Christmas spatulas and Christmas doormats and who hangs twinkle lights on anything that sits still.

I have nothing funny to blog about, no snarky observations or pithy banter. I'm just too effing happy.

Christmas Card Outtakes

I decided to try my hand at making a Christmas card this year. I've always wanted to. It seems like a proper "family" thing to do, and now that Robinson is here, I'd say I have a proper family, so I should act the part, right? Making a Christmas card goes against my procrastinator's sensibilities, because creating, ordering, addressing, and mailing Christmas cards requires planning in advance and executing. You see, I lack follow-through. That's why I never start scrapbook or sewing projects because I don't want to have to look at a graveyard of unfinished craft projects. It just illuminates my slacker-ness.

The only person who was happy about the Christmas card photo shoot was Laney. Did I mention she's an internationally sought-after glamour model?

After an hour of unsuccesfully trying to photograph Rob using the camera on my cell phone (yeah, it's come to that), I invited Laney to join him under the tree. First, she sat four feet away from Rob by the fireplace. I motioned for her to sit closer to him. That's when she gave me this:



Season's Greetings!
xoxo,
Laney

That is a bunk nativity scene if I've ever seen one. She looks at me like, "Here's your shot. That's a wrap." Robinson wasn't digging my whole "Away in a Manger" concept.

So I tried dressing him up.

It's supposed to be a Christmas card, not an entry photo for a Baby Gap model search. Also, he looks like a first grader. Not the "Baby's First Christmas" card I envisioned. Next.

For every smiley face shot I get, there's twenty of him crying or with his hand in his mouth.

Then I began peeling his clothes off, layer by layer, til we were back to "naked baby" As you can see, this drug on for some time...

 

Most pictures were this good. Robinson is bored, and Laney looks like el chupacabra. These pictures are misleading, because Laney is pretty indifferent towards Robinson. Libby is his real-life bestie. I tried to include Libby, and she is nearby while I am shooting, but every time I invited her to sit with Laney and Rob, she tucked tail and ran outside. I think my invitation to be photographed translates in dog-speak to "I will deport you!" because that was her reaction.

I'm proud to say I have placed the order for Christmas cards with Shutterfly, and once they've been mailed, I'll share it with the blogosphere! I hope everybody is enjoying the holidays!

Thanksgiving Holiday: By The Numbers

Helloooo and Happy December! I haven't blogged in a week because I was in Alabama celebrating the Thanksgiving holiday. I need to stretch a bit before getting back to the blog, so here's a rundown of my trip...by the numbers.

Length of trip in days: 7
Outfits packed: 9
Hours spent driving from Dallas to Birmingham: 9.5
Time wasted in detours thanks to an unreliable "Starbucks Finder" phone app: 0.5
Dogs boarded at our local kennel: 2
Dogs reported to suffer from separation anxiety at said kennel, resulting in explosive diarrhea: 1
Dogs on hunger strike at kennel because she's pissed she wasn't included in our vacation: 1
Pounds of turkey breast purchased from Rudy's for Thanksgiving dinner: 4
Hitchikers spotted on the interstate: 1
Christmas CDs I forced Steve to listen to: 2
Iron Bowl parties attended: 2
"Tipsy Tiger" cocktails consumed at Iron Bowl party: 3
Friends visited: 20
Homecooked meals prepared by my loving mother: 4
Rounds of golf played (by Steve of course!): 1
Trips to Starbucks: 3
Hours spent driving from Birmingham to Dallas: 10
Pounds gained: 5

The Thanksgiving Story According to Wednesday Addams

I love Peter MacNicol and Christine Baranski in Addams Family Values. They show us that "anyone, no matter how odd or pale or chubby, can still have a darn good time...whether they like it or not."

"White meat aaaand dark meat, take it away!"



Blogger's note: I'm pretty sure that the actress who plays David Krumholtz's mom (and delivers the line: "Twenty grand fuh summah camp, he's "Mistah Woo Woo") was also Bitsy von Muffling in Sex and the City. Yep, a quick IMDB search confirms. I am so smart.

Oh, and in case you want to teach your children "The Thanksgiving Story According to Wednesday Addams", here's a handy transcript:

You have taken the land which is rightfully ours.
Years from now, my people will be forced to live in mobile homes on reservations.
Your people will wear cardigans and drink highballs.
We will sell our bracelets by the roadsides.
You will play golf and enjoy hot hors d'oeuvres.
My people will have pain and degradation.
Your people will have stick shifts.
The gods of my tribe have spoken.
They have said, "Do not trust the pilgrims, especially Sarah Miller."
And for all these reasons, I have decided to scalp you and burn your village to the ground.

50 Free Holiday Cards From Shutterfly!

I just love receiving holiday cards! Please know that if you send me one that includes a photo, I save it forever. Several years ago, I opened a Christmas card that was addressed to the former homeowners, and the family photo Christmas card was so hilariously awkward that I continue to display it every year.

Holiday cards are a thoughtful and time-honored tradition, but in this economy it can seem cost-prohibitive. Shutterfly not only has an excellent reputation for their customer service and prompt delivery, but also a beautiful selection of photo holiday cards to fit any budget. I always wanted to send out adorable Christmas cards featuring my dogs dressed as elves or snowflakes, but I just never got around to it. Now that little Robinson is here, we'll be sending out cards for sure! If you've ordered Christmas cards with Shutterfly in the past, be sure to check out the new cards for 2010. They're all so pretty I can't decide which one to choose!

Shutterfly isn't just for photos and greeting cards. If you're planning to host a party this holiday season, be sure to check out their stylish invitations!

If you're in need of a gift idea (for grandparents, perhaps?) a photo calendar always makes a splash! Creating one has never been quicker or easier. But don't take my word for it, click here and see for yourself!

And, if you think that calendars are the only gift items on which you can plaster your child's beautiful face, you are dead wrong! I was very impressed with their selection of photo gifts. Who knows, you may one day be the proud recipient of an an apron, mouse pad, refrigerator magnet, coasters, or a deck of playing cards with my baby's face on it. You'll be the envy of the neighborhood!

For all you practical-types out there, Shutterfly offers cute and affordable options to meet your stationary and gift-giving needs by offering address labels and gift tags. Well, they've just thought of everything, haven't they?

Once the holiday season has ended, don't go forgetting about your ol' pal Shutterfly. They're still there working hard for you making birthday and Bar Mitzvah invitations, thank you cards and birth announcements. See them all here!

To all my blogger buddies out there: If you want 50 free holiday cards from Shutterfly (and I know you do!) Find out how you can participate by clicking here!

Season's Greetings to you, too!

We're Way Past "Sugar-Coating"

How great is it when you get to the point in your relationship where you can speak without censoring yourself or sugar-coating anything? I asked Steve a very simple question the other day, and after listening to his reply, I realized that he would have given a totally different response to that same question if I had asked it ten years ago, when we were just dating...

Me: I want to put up the Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving. Are they in the attic in a place where I can easily bring them down?
What Steve Would've Said 10 Years Ago: Oh, no, don't you worry about that. I'll bring down the decorations. I love you!
What Present-Day Steve Actually Said: Uh...I would feel more comfortable if I were the one to bring down the decorations. I can't have your clumsy-ass falling.
Me: [blank stare]
Steve: You know you're clumsy, right? Right?

So, Steve from the past and the present doesn't want me climbing into the attic for fear I may sustain a traumatic brain injury, so he offers to do the heavy-lifting for me. Only "past" Steve feels the need to protect my feelings from the true reason for his desire to help me.

Boys just never learn though, do they? What Steve still hasn't figured out in ten years is that I never had any intention of bringing those Christmas decorations down by myself. When I asked, "Are the Christmas decorations in the attic in a place where I can easily bring them down?" I was really asking, "Will you bring down the Christmas decorations for me?" So now, Steve is doing the heavy-lifting for me, and he thinks it's his idea. And I don't risk falling out of the attic onto the concrete floor of the garage...because I am very clumsy. It's a win-win.