It's Nice to Feel Needed

I arrived at work this morning with this email waiting in my Inbox from my friend, Sally:

Subject: Question for your Expertise

"My mom...was asking me last night if I knew of any great waterproof mascara that doesn't clump. I said that I wasn't sure, but if anyone would know, it would be Fricke! :) I immediately thought back to our weekend at Talladega...the forecast called for rain, so Fricke purchased waterproof mascara! I have to say, I will always be impressed when I think of the way you shaved your legs out the door of your car....and made it acceptable and cool...even at Talladega. It takes a real pro to pull something like that off!! And you did it flawlessly."

This is the second email in as many weeks I have received from friends reminiscing about our legendary trip to Talladega in 2004 where, most notably, I shaved my legs using nothing but a Venus razor and a bottle of Dasani water I had packed expressly for this purpose. I had forgotten all about that, but I guess my friends found it memorable. I realize we were camping at Talladega Superspeedway, but this is America, and leg stubble is unacceptable. What was I to do? I wish I had a scanner so I could upload a picture of me in my white trash get-up I chose for the occasion: denim cutoffs, cut-up wife beater, orange padded push-up bra (unintentional and overexposed, but I worked it out), obnoxiously large hoop earrings, Chanel sunglasses, koozie featuring a surfing duck I purchased at a gas station on the way to 'dega. We had a ball! Just to clarify, I was not sitting out in the middle of the campsite shaving in front of all of 'dega and drawing attention to myself like some kind of unsophisticated street urchin. I was raised better than that. I was in the driver's seat of the Tahoe with the driver and rear doors open to create a "privacy booth" where I might discretely shave and re-apply self tanner and waterproof mascara. Glad I could clear that up.

In case you were hoping I would impart some knowledge on you today, here was my response to Sally's query:

"As I type this, I am reaching into my purse to retrieve my (almost dried out) tube of Lancome L'Extreme Waterproof Black Mascara ($24). It has been my everyday mascara for about a year now, because it is really dark, it holds the curl beautifully, lengthens, and doesn't clump or make my lashes stick together. I learned a trick from a makeup artist regarding waterproof mascara: unlike regular mascara, where you are advised to apply a few thin coats and allow time to try in between applications, with waterproof mascara it is important to apply all of the coats at once, before it has a chance to dry. I thought it seemed counterintuitive and a recipe for disaster, but it turns out the makeup artist knows her stuff! I used Cover Girl at Talladega and it performed pretty well, and I've also used Maybelline Great Lash Waterproof. I thought the Maybelline made my lashes look short and choppy, but maybe that's because I had not yet learned my waterproof mascara application trick!"